The last couple of weeks in middle school have been extremely difficult. I feel like my day is filled up with nothing but reprimanding and refereeing. All of a sudden, everyone has a major attitude and has decided to give up. As a teacher it is so disheartening. How do I motivate? How do I encourage? How do not fall into the same habits as my children? From 8:30 this morning, until 2:30 this afternoon it was one incident after the other. From one child who becomes outraged if the wind blows the wrong way, to another child throwing a book across the room out of anger, to another child screaming and calling me names... needless to say I pulled out of my school today in tears. I was not crying because of hurt feelings or personal violation; it was more of a brokenness for these children. I’m not dealing with rebellious adolescents; I’m dealing with rebellious sinners in great need for a Savior. Why would they make the right choice? Why would they be different? When I look at my students, I think about how many of them hear the name of Jesus in their home. It sickens me to think about it. How many of them will hear the gospel in their lifetime? I heard someone saying the other day that, “As a teacher you hold souls in your hand every day.” Forgive me Lord for forgetting about this, for allowing my sin of impatience, anger, and numbness to keep me from loving these children. Give me the grace to love them like you love me.
Wednesday, March 23, 2011
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